All I could see was the dark expanse of space.
It was as dark as if I’d wandered into the Horsehead Nebula with a blindfold on: there wasn’t a single speck of starlight to be found. Quite frankly, this might be just a half-assed attempt at drawing a background. And here I was, hoping for some kind of flashy special effects. Well, I’m sure that even the empty void of space has its own concerns to deal with. Something along the lines of budget or technical/time constraints.
“Can’t see a thing.”
I muttered to no one in general. My display’s been showing a black screen the entire time. I have to wonder if my monitor’s broken.
As I pondered my current location in deep space, a dot of light appeared on the bottom of my empty screen and began to advance, forcing me to comment.
“Hey, Haruhi. Shouldn’t you stay back a little more? Your flagship’s a little too far up.”
Haruhi’s reply came as follows.
“Operations Officer, address me as ‘Your Excellency.’ As chief of the SOS Brigade, I hold the same rank as a general field marshal. I’m top dog here.”
I didn’t even get a chance to make a wisecrack about her use of “Operations Officer” and “Your Excellency” before someone else spoke up.
“Your Excellency, Intelligence Officer Nagato has reported that the enemy armada is behaving suspiciously. Your orders?”
Koizumi delivered his status report and Haruhi gave her reply.
“It doesn’t matter. We simply charge!”
A typical Haruhi order, but nobody would ever follow it. Hell, nobody did, since we all knew that a frontal assault would get us torn apart like the Takeda cavalry at Tanegashima.
Asahina had a worried look on her face as she raised her hand.
“Um…What am I supposed to do…?”
“Mikuru, you’ll only get in the way, so have your supply fleet go off somewhere else, since I’m not expecting anything from you. Kyon, you join Yuki and Koizumi in taking out their vanguard. And then I’ll deliver the coup de grace. With style!”
I really want somebody to stop her.
I looked back at my monitor to check on the position of my fleet, part of the SOS Brigade Space Force. The fifteen thousand vessels under my command, dubbed the <Kyon Fleet> by Haruhi, were currently advancing toward the front lines in a position directly behind the <Her Excellency☆Haruhi☆Fleet>. The <Koizumi Fleet> was flanking mine, while our consistent and steady bastion the <Yuki Fleet> was way ahead of us, scouting enemy movements. When I looked around for the <Mikuru Fleet>, which included the supply ships, I found that her shaky operation had left her lost from the beginning of the battle.
“Wah—Which way am I supposed to go?”
Asahina was practically squealing in bewilderment as she bumbled around like usual.
Any direction works. Just chill behind us, please. These ships may only exist on a screen, but I still don’t want to see harm done to something with your name on it.
Suddenly the monitor before me began to display a number of changes. Data from the scouts of <Yuki Fleet> had been linked to my fleet. My screen, originally a black void with the exception of the symbols marking allied fleets, now displayed the positions of the enemy units Nagato had located.
“Stay back, Haruhi,” I said. “They’ve split their armada. I’m guessing that they’re searching for your position. The boss should behave accordingly and stay in the back lines.”
“What did you say?”
Haruhi puckered her lips as she objected.
“You’re going to leave me out of this? That’s not fair. I want to get in there and fire beams and missiles like crazy too!”
I ordered <Kyon Fleet> to advance at a brisk pace.
“Listen up, Haruhi. If your flagship is taken out, we lose. Look. The four enemy fleets rushing us are all chumps. The flagship and its fleet are giving orders from the rear. Do you send your king rushing into the enemy when playing chess? Especially when it’s the beginning of a match?”
“Well…you have a point.”
Haruhi had a sullen look on her face with a tinge of bruised ego. Her eyes were locked on me as though she were a cat asking for food.
“Well then, you guys take care of it. Find the enemy flagship and bombard away. We can’t lose to these punks. We’re absolutely going to win. Defeat will ruin the SOS Brigade reputation. And most important of all, I wouldn’t be able to stand them lording it over us!”
“Your Excellency.”
Koizumi immediately made his report.
“Intelligence Officer Nagato’s <Yuki Fleet> has engaged the enemy vanguard. We will soon be entering battle. I must humbly request that Your Excellency withdraw to the rear and provide the entire force with tactical leadership.”
His voice sounded serious enough, but the smile on his face made it hard to believe he was sincere.
“Oh, really?”
Haruhi seemed to be very pleased by Koizumi’s not-very-subtle attempt to suck up as she sat down in the brigade chief ’s chair with her arms crossed. The look on her face was what you would expect from a young officer straight out of the academy who’d been placed in charge because of his rank, despite his inability to provide strategic leadership.
“I’m willing to listen to the advice of Chief Officer Koizumi. Well then, work hard, everyone. Turn those impertinent computer society freaks into riddled, smoldering smithereens. Our goal is total annihilation. We’re going to smash them.”
I suppose that her being motivated to achieve total victory is a good thing, but she shouldn’t forget that our opponents wanted this battle in space. Our enemy, the computer society, probably has the same aspirations you do.
And from what I’ve seen, the SOS Brigade’s chances of winning were worse than the chances of the Imperial Japanese Navy at Leyte Gulf. There are no ifs in history, but assuming that you reran the scenario with equal numbers and equal forces on both sides, the IJN still would have gotten their asses handed to them. Shouldn’t we just raise the white flag already?
“Well, guess we can’t really do that.”
I rolled up my sleeves and checked my screen again for intelligence on the enemy. Nagato’s delivered again. She’s provided us with data on the positions of virtually every enemy unit, with the exception of the flagship fleet. The responsibility for leading our